Why Money Isn’t Enough
Why Money Isn’t Enough
While not having funds will certainly cause innumerable problems, money isn’t enough. If I wasn’t sure of this before, I definitely am after all the things that have changed in my life over the last few weeks. None of them earth shattering, but all have made me deeply question my future plans. To put it metaphorically, someone has moved my cheese.
I pretty much had it all mapped out. My life. Post financial independence. I would continue doing hospice work because it gave me meaning and insured the ability to live a fatFIRE lifestyle.
I would continue writing a blog, podcasting, and public speaking because these are my meaning and purpose above and beyond family and community.
Simple, right? Well maybe not so much. Suddenly, everything has changed.
Trouble in Paradise
My hospice job was paradise. It allowed me to spend just the right amount of time doing something purposeful each week without all the stress of patient care, overwhelming administrative work, or a long commute. It gave me a regular schedule and assured for at least 15 hours a week, I had a place to be and friendly people to interact with.
And then a bomb dropped. Regulators came in and tore my company apart. It is a long story and this is not the place to tell it. I have been offered to continue in a new position with double the commute, half the pay, and have been disconnected from most of the people I have grown to care about. And between you and me, I am not sure that this company will even be around in a few months.
Of course,you say, I could find a similar job
with another hospice. While this might be possible, it is quite unlikely. The size of this company allowed me to manage such a big group and not have to see patients. I can look for other positions, but what I had was perfect.
And let me stress that this is not about money. I really don’t need more (although it certainly is nice). It’s about having a sense of everyday purpose and meaning.
I am sure I will find a solution. I just don’t know what it will be yet.
Identity and Creativity
I am going to drop a bomb now. Highly unorthodox since I just learned myself. But Paul has decided to leave The What’s Up Next Podcast as of January.
This totally caught me by surprise. I guess looking back, I should have realized that he was not enjoying it as much as I was, or as much as he used to. It is so hard to tell.
But I can’t help but feel a real sense of loss. Yes, I am going to keep doing the podcast myself. Yes, I will continue to do panel discussions and hope that the quality and feel of the podcast will continue to soar.
Yet, my disappointment is real. I naively felt that being financially free would release me of having such worries. That all of the sudden, nothing could ever bring me down because I was bulletproof.
It turns out that I am not bulletproof. That I am no less likely to suffer the ups and downs of being human. Of having hopes and dreams both realized and squashed.
And this thing that Paul and I created. This thing that I love and was meant to be a big part of my upcoming time. My heart and soul. Now sits at a crossroads with as many possible dead ends as superhighways.
Final Thoughts
The cliche holds true. Money can’t buy love. It can’t buy identity, meaning, or purpose. This has been a hard last few weeks. Many of the constants in my life have turned out to be much more feeble than I had expected.
So I will attempt to build anew. Recalculate. Reconstruct. Pivot.
And start again,
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I think I commented a year ago or so that your hospice job was so unique it would be irreplaceable! That’s a situation you can’t control.
At least the podcasts are up to you. Of course, you should ask Paul why he’s leaving. It may be that after 100 podcasts or so, it’s just not as satisfying anymore. Time for bigger (and better paying) challenges?
Best wishes for another year of whatever you decide.
I’m sorry to hear this about your job – I remember you beaming when I asked you about job design at FinCon, I could tell you had found the perfect balance to provide yourself freedom but keep the mental stimulation, professional identity, and sense of purpose. I had those moments in my career too where a great thing came to an end. I know you’ll persevere.
Doc G, I am sorry to hear about all of the change! The current situation seemed ideal for you when we last spoke about it, and I am sorry that it will not keep going the way that it has. I pray that you find the balance you currently enjoy in some other way.
Thinking of you, brother.
TPP
A double whammy as we near the year’s end. You will clearly miss the clinical work and the southern gentleman with the soothing voice.
The next chapter will look a bit different than the last, but I have no doubt it will be exciting and fulfilling in ways you can’t anticipate. I’m glad to know you’ll be continuing on with What’s Up Next. You guys deserve every ounce of plastic in that Plutus Award you took home for the best new personal finance podcast. 😉
Cheers!
-PoF
Sadness and disappointment are an inevitable realities in life, but at least you had the opportunity to experience a sort of utopia with the previous job. Though the specific job may be irreplaceable, the fulfillment obtained from it will leave an impact on your future forever.
As for the podcast, transition is often very difficult and often leads to questioning. I wanted to personally say that I’ve listened to each episode and have listened to some episodes 2-3 times. They’ve been inspirational, fascinating, humorous, and passionate. I hope you find a replacement for Paul or decide to continue the podcasting journey alone. You have inspired many through your story and I wish you the best in the future.
I’m excited to see where everything will end up,
Alex
I love your strength to be so candid. I left my job about a year ago not because things changed (now looking back, maybe I had changed?). I grieved these changes because I was not ready. Looking back, I see that I would have stayed forever because I was comfortable, but it was time to go. There were other things I needed to do. Those things are just seeming to form and come to me, sometimes almost effortlessly, but they did not when I was working part time. I had to let go of the trapeze with both hands in order to be able to grab the next adventure. I have learned a lot the last year and the transition is beautiful and difficult, and has been the best year of my life. If there is one thing I would share if you decide to exit traditional work is dont force productivity. I am paraphrasing something Vicki Robin told me as I made my own trasition last year. Take a break, enjoy. Actually rest. When your mind and heart are more rested, creativity blooms in a way that is not otherwise possible.
Retired life is about enjoying the ride. If you’re not enjoying the ride get a different horse. Retirement is about not working despite all the rhetoric and machinations otherwise. When you retire is when the rubber really meets the road regarding what FI actually means.
I think this could be actually quite an informative situation. It points out the instability of contract work and small business and how much you should trust these as stable sources of income if at all. I’m sorry for your dilemma but out of dilemma comes opportunity, the opportunity to discover, dissect and share what life outside the nice tidy narrative is really like. A much more valuable insight than 4 x 25.
Retirement is about an ending and then a beginning. Fare well in your ending and beginning
I started up some consulting side gigs four years ago when I retired and they earn a good bit of unneeded money for only a day or two of actual work, mostly from home or at out of town locations within easy driving distance. They have added a lot to my transition to retirement because like your Hospice work, they provide a big social context for me. I also feel that I’m doing my part to maintain good STEM jobs in my low income state so it has a feel good mission to it. I’ve held my clients together but the fees I charge for myself, lawyers and consultants are pretty high and as some businesses have shut down the survival prospects for my consultancy look worse every year. I’ve wondered how I’ll react if I find myself out of my dream retirement job, as you are. Right now I’m still an engineer like you are still a doctor but if I stop doing technical and regulatory work I’m not sure what I’ll be? I’ll be interested in following your journey, I’m very sorry you have had this change, but I’m probably on the same path within a year or two myself so I’ll be looking at how you adjust. Good luck Doc G!
Damn, really sorry to hear Doc, both about the company and Paul leaving. The good news is that you’ve set yourself up to not have to worry about the money side of life so you can focus on moving forward in your creative endeavors and identity, and that’s a huge leg up. I’m still swimming those waters too, but I too have the financial safety net. We’ll figure it out
So sorry to hear this news. Whats Up Next had quickly become one of my favorites, and I really enjoyed the chemistry and different perspectives the two of you brought. That said, I’m sure the next chapter will be better than ever, and I wish you continued success professionally and podcast-ly.
Thanks for all that you do.
Sorry for the hospice job loss. I can understand the meaning of that job. I too had designed what I thought was the perfect bridge job to retirement. I was closing my OB/Gyn practice when I was approached by the local hospital to help in a new OB/GYn practice. It was 3 days per week with no call. My contract was not re-newed. I was very surprised. Guess after being self-employed I forgot how the world worked. Needless to say at 62 with a tidy nest-egg I no longer need to work. I recently moved prior to this happening. I am finding that my new neighborhood is offering all the social contacts that I miss from work. Life is about re-invention I think.
Doc G,
I’m sorry about the turbulence you’re experiencing. I often have to remind myself that life is supposed to be 50/50…good/bad, happy/sad, etc.
I always appreciate how thoughtful and open you are here and on the podcast. This is meaningful work to me and many others. Thank you.
Wow, Doc – sorry about the double whammy. It’s great that you have a big part of it (money) that you don’t have to worry about, but losing purpose and connection is never easy. You do so much for the community, and I’m hopeful that you’ll find even stronger connections going forward. I’m glad to hear you’ll be continuing with What’s Up Next.
I’m sorry to hear all these things, but I know you’ll come out alright in the end. The questions help us find our way.
Thank you for sharing this vulnerable side. Being open with the community (and Internet at large) about this feeling of being adrift after having “figured it all out” is a really brave and inspiring thing to do. Happy to lend you any hope you need that your path will evolve and emerge into something very cool and very fulfilling. I hear the pain of loss and hear the resolve, and have confidence that things will be different AND great moving forward.
Sorry about the two surprises. I’m just wondering whether you truly don’t realize why. your podcast partner left? Spend some time listening to your podcasts again. If you don’t realize somethings I’ll just point them out to you. I’m not trying to be mean, but honest.
– You dominate the hosting and don’t let him speak and ask questions as much.
– You interview the same people in the community, which makes the topics stale
– In a number of episodes, you sound very smug, saying you live off $200,000 and are FatFIRE. You turn off a lot of people.
– Your episodes are just so self-congratulatory on how rich you and your guests are, it’s not interesting e.g. https://diversefi.com/2019/11/25/whats-up-next-podcast-episode-65/
– It seems like you are longing for approval and friendship because you are forcing the issue and trying too hard
– Even though your site says “diverse fi” you don’t have diverse guests and talks around the community are that you suppress other viewpoints from people with different backgrounds.
I hope this feedback is helpful. So many people go through life wondering why them and what’s wrong with them because nobody told them the truth.
Jane