Retired Early and Stressed Out Anyway
Retired Early and Stressed Out Anyway
Yesterday I used a home as an analogy for retirement. To build a home, one must have a strong foundation. Although an ultimate necessity, this foundation, like financial independence, is just the beginning. How we fill each of the rooms and celebrate the structure will ultimately define the quality of our post work life. It is easy to think that once you have built the framework you are done. But as any home builder knows, there are still many improvements to be made. The journey doesn’t end with financial independence. It begins. There are pitfalls to be maneuvered around. There is no benefit to being retired early and stressed out anyway.
Although it seems counterintuitive that one could be both FI and stressed out, I think that many are. Life stressors don’t just go away when the bank accounts are stuffed. In fact, the very life strategies and qualities that lead to financial competence can also have a dark side.
The Achievement Treadmill
You have to be pretty goal focused to reach financial independence and decide to retire early. There has to be some front loading of the sacrifice and serious budget savvy. We strive on reaching the top of the mountain. In fact, for many of us the act of climbing is a high unto itself.
So what happens when you stop needing to climb? For a person who has been career oriented their whole life, this can lead to some vertigo. Often there is a transfer of addictions. All that energy and focus from work needs an outlet. It usually gets displaced to a new creative or business venture. While originally this can be quite gratifying, the treadmill can lead to the same dysphoric behavior that brought on the need for early retirement in the first place.
When you are having trouble sleeping at night or are waking up before the alarm clock because of a massive to do list, the benefits of the FIRE lifestyle disappear.
You are retired early and stressed out anyway.
Time Stress
I have talked in the past about my issues with time stress. As a busy multitasker, it can be easy to find yourself rushing through just about everything. Not only do you annoy your family and friends, you miss out on the flavor of all the wonder going on around you.
Yet not working can produce the opposite effect. Once you are unhinged from the daily schedule and slow down, it is easy to become completely inefficient. All the sudden that one task on the calendar looms so large you re cancelling all other plans for the day. I know it sounds silly, but there is such a thing as the efficient time frontier.
The less you have to do, the more emotional energy to worry about the few blips in your otherwise leisurely lifestyle. You become retired early and stressed out anyway.
Loss Aversion
There is so much joy thinking about how great life will be once financial independence is reached, it is easy to forget that finances are fluid. World circumstances change and markets can be stubborn. You may be financially independent one day and not the next.
Of course this idea is ridiculous. Most of the differences are just on paper and will likely not affect life. But the fear of loss aversion, of getting to the top mountain and then being forced a few steps back down, looms large.
We are scared to death that once we attain this wonderful marvel, that it will be snatched back out of our hands.
These worries can lead to all sorts of irrational behavior. There is a tendency to embrace stoicism and double down on the budget. We create new and diverse revenue streams although we don’t even need them. We end up retired early and stressed out anyway regardless of our best intentions.
Final Thoughts
Financial independence and early retirement are not just about the numbers. There is a philosophical and emotional side. The difference between contentedness and being early retired and stressed out anyway may be in how you handle the head game.
Recognizing the pitfalls and actively planning for them is helpful.
But you probably won’t know how it truly feels until you get there.
Balance. Work & play. You write. Your “Novel of the Century ” is waiting for you to see her. Therin resides The Muse. You’ll see her when you’re ready. Happy hunting!
Thanks Norman. A hunting I will go.
Analogy, eh? Man I thought you were actually building a new house…You write in metaphors too well, scholars need to study these posts. Haha, but I did understand this post very well and I think it basically comes down to RE isn’t for everyone and there are certain types of people who would not do well with RE.
Very true. RE is becoming less the thing, more about freedom,
What you write is real. The solution is to live through it, pay attention, have a plan and then check your plan against the reality of how it unfolded. It took me a year. I checked my budget 4 times a month had contingencies for my contingencies and lived on the edge. After a year my plan unfolded exactly as I predicted. For example I knew I was going to have to replace a couple air handlers so the dough for that was prestashed. I made my budget around a 3.3% payout and then decided to see upfront what living a belt tightened life felt like. I cut back and could hardly tell any difference and my wife was cool with it so I live a 2.5% lifestyle which can expand to a 3.3% life style on any given month. If I want to go to Europe I just save up a couple months and go. If I don’t I bank the dough. After the year I quit worrying about it. It was obvious I was bullet proof and would only become more bullet proof as time went on. It takes a year to understand the moving parts and the points of friction
I see your point. it just takes time to test out your hypothesis and pivot if needed.
It all depends on what stage of life you are at, especially if your kids are grown or not.
I retired early over 10 years ago and have had 0 active income, but since then I got married, had a child, started a college fund, started paying for health insurance out of pocket, etc etc. There is no real certainty in my budget. Having an 8 figure portfolio smooths out the jagged edges, but I do not live completely stress-free about finances.
An eight figure portfolio helps, but in the end there is always some stress.
I totally agree with this! I wrote a similar thing a while back after seeing some of my friends (some FIRE and some traditional retirement age) struggle with the “new normal.” It’s a weird thing, but it definitely exists.
Feel free to post your link here in the comments. I love to see people agreeing with my sentiments!
Thanks, Doc! I try to be respectful when leaving comments and don’t want to link spam anyone. Here’s the post: https://thesterlingreport.com/retirement-freakout/
If you’d like to talk about guest posts sometime, please let me know! I’m always happy to contribute A. Content or B. Blog space to post someone else’s content.
Hey Jon. You’re welcome to drop links here anytime. Have not really been doing the guest post thing much.
I may be the strange one but so far, in three years of early retirement, I haven’t had a moment of angst or doubt. I didn’t take a day off before I kicked off some of my paid side gigs and maybe that helped because they involve the same people my 9 to 5 did, just in a different context. And the gigs did keep my identity as a really smart business/technical/negotiator type person intact so there was not a lot of mansplaining to do about who I was or what I did as might be the case for other retirees. And since working a day or two a week pays 100% of what living costs us it took any financial doubts off the table. The only thing I’ve had to ponder at all is whether to expand or cut back my paid work and my volunteer gigs. And that is really a back burner simmer and hasn’t risen to the level of anything remotely resembling stress.
You have been a good role model for me in this aspect. I am trying to do the same exact thing with my hospice work.
I work with Hospice in my volunteer world and am familiar with how that works for an MD. I think it would be very analogous to my consulting and should be a real stress reducer. Also it offers the chance to ramp up or down possibly if you find you do not want that much employment or possibly want more. Plus it is a real awesome thing you are doing, helping people make that passage with dignity and the most comfort possible is the work of angels. Thanks for what you do!
Thanks for saying that. It is a nice glide path for me.
I still have trouble sleeping some nights and wake up right before the alarm sometimes in my half retirement. Always something to work on…
Yep. Right there with you!