Financial Independence and the Emotional Construct of Scarcity
The Emotional Construct of Body Image
Although since college I have told everybody that I am 6 Feet tall, in reality, It’s closer to 5’11”. A few years ago when I weighed 180 pounds, I wouldn’t have called myself obese. Maybe a little over-weight, but not too bad. My waist size was a solid 36 inches. I certainly looked good in a tuxedo, but who doesn’t look good in a tuxedo? Right? Back then I had formed an image of myself, an emotional construct, in my mind.
I was athletic but a little pudgy. I could see the beginnings of a role forming over the belt line. Certainly I wasn’t the guy who was going to take his shirt off when jogging on a warm summer day. This construct of self, this internal image of who I am, turned out to be quite resistant to change.
Over the last three years I have lost a ton of weight. For fun after thanksgiving one year, I decided to track my food intake with the app myfitnesspal.com. Over months the pounds peeled off, and my weight leveled off at 150 pounds. This drastic change was quickly noted by friends and colleagues. All of the sudden, my waist line was a hot topic of discussion.
The weight loss felt good. I was thin and in shape. My energy levels were great, and my self-esteem was at an all time high.
But there was a catch. You see, when I took my clothes off and looked in the mirror, I didn’t see any difference. I was the same pudgy me with my belly hanging over the belt line. My mind was able to analyze and know that my eyes were playing a trick on me. I could measure my waist, I could pick through the clothes that now would fall off my backside even with a belt.
My emotional construct, my internal image, however, no longer matched reality.
And it was really hard to reconcile.
The Emotional Construct of Scarcity
I stumbled onto the concept of financial independence quite by accident. I made the leap from understanding FI, to yearning for FI, to realizing I was FI within minutes. While logically my mind can grasp the revelation, I am still stuck in the emotional construct of scarcity. My internal image of myself is still fixed on being a creator, an earner, a worker, and a doctor.
I am metaphorically looking in the mirror, and I don’t see wealth or even enough, I see the guy hustling to build an empire. I am stuck in the creation phase even long after the reason for creating has started to wane. Who needs to build new revenue streams when you have enough? The rat race to move up the ladder has come to an end. The emotional allure of another paycheck should no longer drag me into lucrative but unappealing opportunities.
Yet it does. Over and over again. I find myself charging head first into another revenue generating activity without asking whether it is bringing me closer to my true purpose. My true calling.
The emotional construct of scarcity is too strong. It distorts. It tells me that I am on the cusp of financial dependence and not independence. The construct laughs at my abundance, and mocks my every attempt to slow down.
And it’s not just me. All of you who are shooting for a saving level of 40X current spending or have set your safe withdrawal rate less than 3.5%. You guys are in the same boat with me.
Those of you who are struggling with one more year. You are my brethren.
How To Overcome the False Emotional Construct?
Your guess is as good as mine.
When it came to weight, I compared myself to old pictures. I tracked my waist circumference and weight levels. I studied myself in parts. Focusing on one specific geographic area, and noted how it looked more lean than before. Slowly, I was able to reprogram my internal image of my body.
With my finances, I am trying to do the same. I compare net worth from earlier years to my current. Spending habits are also contrasted. I calculate my safety no matter how bad the markets turn. By doing this, I am re-writing my internal hard drive. Creating a newer more healthy emotional construct.
I suspect, with a little time, it will stick.
This is an interesting analogy – alteration of one’s body and alteration of one’s financial position. The scarcity mindset sounds like a case of ‘money dysmorphia’ or ‘financial dysmorphia’.
In the context of the body / sport, I think this is why you see silver medalist Olympians crying on the podium because they missed out on gold and world record holders with anguish in their eyes when they fail to achieve another personal best. When one’s existence is dedicated to ‘more’ this does not necessarily lead to contentment – even where your results are better than almost everyone else’s or, in the case of the world record holder, you are the best that has ever lived (perhaps even the best that WILL ever live).
“I am metaphorically looking in the mirror, and I don’t see wealth or even enough, I see the guy hustling to build an empire.” The dysmorphia could lead to a kind of money addiction where you are addicted to earning and collecting more and more (even when you are self-aware enough to realise that more money /income streams aren’t bringing you satisfaction at a deeper level).
On building an empire, the allure of ‘more’ can be hard to resist. There’s a saying that when Alexander the Great saw the breadth of his domain, he wept…for there were no more worlds to conquer. The mindset for long term contentment would appear to be being satisfied that one has enough rather than perpetually chasing after more.
HH
P.S. I’ll be the first to admit that I’m very bad at following my own advice on this final point!
Hey Hustle Hawk. I think financial dysmorphia is right. I know it won’t last forever…but it may take sometime to re learn the right mindset.
I really like your essays on self-analysis. I think high achievers identify strongly with their work and productivity. It’s who they are. It’s hard to change such a strong self-perception.
It’s remarkable you hard to change our own internal vision of ourselves.
I struggle with this in my career. I doubt myself in a lot of circumstances and continually think I don’t bring much value even though I have had mentors and leaders in my organization tell me otherwise. I still always see the experienced, young accountant from years ago. It is a hard mindset to shift.
I think this is common when you are conscientious. I feel the same way with medicine sometimes even still.
Your spot on, part of the challenge with ever actualyl leaving work is removing yourself from your work identity. There’s an ego involved for some in telling people “I’m a division president for a fortune 500 company”. Listening to the minimalists has helped in that regard.
Financial scarcity is similar, my better half looks at me sideways when I tell her our first retirement home needs to be a duplex we live in half. She says “we’re not 24 and I worked too hard to share a wall”. Fair point, even if its not the best financial decision.
My wife also looks at me sideways when I say I no longer want to own a house, I want to rent. She thinks I’m crazy. Thanks for stopping by!